It is very important in these times of social, political, and environmental collapse to wear clothes emblazoned with a small red tag on the chest. 

The red tag and the white lettering it contains should be appropriated from an anti-consumerism artist of renown, who in turn appropriated her look, for the purposes of satire, from the mainstream press and marketing. 

What is clearly needed now is another t-shirt designer who has appropriated the red tag from the fashionistas own twice-appropriated red tag, who will sell it back to the punters.

This all sounds like a lot of bollocks. 

Which it is. 

Hence the design. 

And the others in the series. 

Wear and appropriate the bollocks from Fictional Shirts.

So the marketing blurb goes. 

It seems that everyone needs to be wearing some kind of red and white tag on their shirts these days. Osaka is flecked liberally with red, as if splattered with the gore of a mad marketers chainsaw convention. Meanwhile, in London there seems to be a perma-gueue outside the branch of a particular brand just around the corner from Gosh! Comics. 

Thoughts come together in a rush: I need money; this fetishistic branding is bollocks; I like playing with graphics; I like tee-shirts; if I can diversify a little, perhaps I can drive more people towards buying my books; and most of all, I want a t-shirt with a red bollocks flash on it. 

Which led me to set up this little business thing. 

It’s not all tees, though. There are mugs (appropriately), phone and tablet covers, and bags and other bits and bobs, all emblazoned with bollocks. 

And it’s not all bollocks, either. I also have shirts and bric-a-brac printed with ‘innit’ and other witty stuff. And there will be lots more as we go along. 

Now that you want a bollocks shirt or mug, you can get yourself one at my online store, appropriately and pithily named Fictional Shirts.